Milestone Birthdays

Dirty Thirty. Naughty Forty. Nifty Fifty. And Sixty?

I’m not sure what we’re calling sixty. Sensational Sixty? Sexy Sixty? Perhaps by then we’ve given up on snazzy nicknames for it and are just grateful to have made it.

The double birthday phenomenon

I’ve photographed a few milestone birthday parties now, even a few double ones – mother/daughter, girlfriend/boyfriend, two generations, two sets of friends, double the mayhem. Two worlds collide, fuelled by refreshments, post-food-coma resurrections and a DJ who is musically unpredictable in their selection, straddling genres and decades. I bloody love it.

Right, where was I? Ah yes… You’ve made it. Another decade. You look fantastic, you’ve gathered your favourite people together, and for once, everyone is there for you. Not a wedding, not a work event, not someone else’s celebration. This one’s all yours.

The arrival: polite society

Now, we know I like my David Attenborough social science format. At the beginning, everyone is terribly polite. People arrive, exchange pleasantries, have group photos with the celebrant, pitch up with a prime seat and behave as though they’re at a particularly civilised garden party. There’s a certain amount of standing around, nursing drinks and waiting for someone else to make the first move.

Feeding time

Food – generally there’s food. It’s almost reckless to have so many drinks and not even a peanut available (strong advice).

Post-buffet / dinner / peanut…

Arms aloft. Shoes abandoned. Ties loosened. People who were barely speaking to each other at 7.30 are suddenly dancing like they’ve been lifelong friends, shouting over the music and egging each other on to swivel those hips. Time to disco!

Cake. Obviously.

Now, cakes can happen whenever. Some are quite surprising; most appear, even if it’s only Colin the Caterpillar. I’ve seen some that need to be wheeled in and accompanied by a fire extinguisher (I kid you not).
I get offered a lot of cake across the year – I usually accept… Anyhoo, so

The late-night arrivals

The late-night owls suddenly appear. They may have been chilling at home, running late or eating elsewhere, but here they are – like super subs in the final minutes of a football derby. Fresh legs, new energy. They are WILD and playing catch-up. Woahhhh, lol. Absolutely no intention of going home – they only just got HERE! Haha.

Some celebrations bring out buffet number two to slow down these amigos.

Oh, I nearly forgot the speeches!

Like my wedding reception bookings, the speeches are beautiful. Whatever the content, the fact that people have taken to standing up and sharing some wonderful memories with the room is a pleasure to document.

A London photographer’s perspective

There’s a knack to photographing these parties, it’s a good mixture; some posed, using flash, some more discreet. I’m a firm believer in the zoom lens. I want to be far enough away that nobody really notices me. No flash, no big production, no stopping people to pose. Just the moments as they happen.

The head thrown back in laughter. The little giggle between friends. Someone’s hand resting on a shoulder. A knowing look across the room. The person who has travelled miles to be there, caught in conversation with someone they haven’t seen for years.

These are the photographs that bring the birthday person the most joy when they look through the gallery afterwards. Often, it’s the little things they didn’t see themselves because, quite understandably, they were busy being the centre of attention.

And that’s the lovely thing about photographs. You get to revisit the evening once the hangover has subsided and discover all the things that happened around you.

Please print your photographs!

Now, this might be controversial, but I’m a big fan of printing photographs. An album, a little collection of favourites, something you can actually pick up and look through. Please don’t let an occasion like this disappear into a folder on a hard drive, never to be opened again.

You’ve gone to all that effort to bring everyone together. You’ve chosen the venue, organised the food, probably spent an inordinate amount of time deciding what to wear, and invited the people who matter to you.

Cherish it.

Confession time…

I had two memorable big birthdays. One was very posh and demure; the later one was carnage. Why does getting older = being naughtier, or is it just me? Everyone turned up AND met my mum. I forgot my cake. Abandoned at the restaurant, never to be seen again except in a Polaroid. Still grates, ha-ha – what an oversight!

Kind of makes sense when I remember I didn’t get home until Monday afternoon. However, I hope you are all far more sensible and, if not, pack a toothbrush!!!

A milestone birthday is every bit as worthy of being documented as a wedding. Both are enormous occasions, both bring people together, and both deserve to be remembered.

And both only happen once*.

Usually. *

P.S. If you see me dancing or the shoulders going when my tune plays, don’t worry. I can take photos and do both.